Thursday, January 9, 2014

Dreamer.



I’m a dreamer, always have been. Dreaming isn't a bad thing. At night, in bed, as I fall asleep I love dreaming of what my life may be. And I think I am closer to many dreams than I thought I was one year ago.

It’s been one year since I sat in the ultrasound room with the doppler on breast as the doctor told me how abnormal my tissue was. There was an urgency of having a mammogram done that day, and I sat in his office twisting my toes, trying to keep my composure.

Here I am a year later, still suffering from the same ‘scanxiety’. Afraid of what test results may bring because let’s face it; I am not used to get good news. The past couple scans have surprised me and today’s didn't let me down either.




Yep, you read that right: “favorable response to therapy with significant decrease . . .“ Even though that report was for my liver, the same goes for my bone metastases.  Minimal radioactive tracer was seen in my bones, meaning there is a decreased size in my bones mets. My right breast still shows no evidence of disease and only a tiny tumor in my left breast.  

*Don’t read too much about that last part- I get ovarian cysts and every time they see them on a scan, I have to go have an ultrasound done to rule out metastatic disease- classic case of CMA (cover my @$$).

The pain I have been having could be arthritis or sciatica, both can be common from the bone mets but not too much to do for it besides pain meds. I just move slower these days and rest more often.



The Plan:
January 16th, 2014 will be my last chemotherapy for now. It will not be the last chemo I will have in my lifetime, I will need it again; but, after 11 months and 33 cycles of it, I am beyond excited to have a break, whether it is for 5 months, 5 years or 15 years. I am not cancer free, Stage IV is incurable and my P53 gene defect (LFS) guarantees my cancer will progress again, or be found in a new location. But, I am responding, and I am securing my life for a lot longer than I expected.

I will continue on my targeted therapies (Herceptin and Xgeva) indefinitely every 3 weeks. As much as I love my nurses and my hospital I would rather much see them once a month than once a week and for shorter intervals.

Next week I will meet with my oncologist and we will start talking about setting this plan in stone and start planning for surgery.


Until then, I am off to dream sweet dreams without care and thank God for His grace.

5 comments:

  1. Wonderful news for a wonderful lady! I'm glad that you are looking forward and dreaming. I'm sure you have your rough days but you have been an inspiration of grace to all.

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  2. Kate,
    So glad to hear about your most recent scan. I've been following your blog for some time now (I had breast cancer at age 26), and up until this post I had no idea you had Li Fraumeni Syndrome. I do also. (my first cancer was Leukemia at the age of 12). I know I've said it before, but I really admire your strength and courage, and I want to thank you for continuing to share your story. Your writing is so beautiful and raw and real. It is amazing for me to meet others with LFS, since as you know, there's not too many of us. Please keep writing and keep staying strong. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Sending love and encouragement,
    Marjie

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  3. Amazing. So happy to read this update. I've been following your story for the past year, and I love when there's good news! :)

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